circumstances

This past Saturday I went to my favorite store to this big sale. They had really neat stuff for really cheap it seemed like it was going to be wonderful. When I got there I found myself frustrated. This is really the first time since I have been here that I have experienced this kind of emotion for these specific reasons. Perhaps the first time that I had considered my income and the lifestyle that I have chosen for myself. I have thought about it before but it has never had this affect on me. I don't like shopping or really anything that resembles it but there are a few stores that I enjoy and desire to own many things from. This happens to be one of those store and I was standing there looking at really neat things that I would love to own but at this moment in my life I could not use or justify owning them. I was frustrated that there were people all around me shopping and buying nice things that I wanted but frankly couldn't afford and truthfully didn't need. As a processed through this later I realized that my life would not be different because of these things. These things do not define who I am or what my life is going to look like. It is also good to be reminded that all that is mine and in this world is God's. Through the emotions that I experienced I realized something. That my life and circumstances have been purposed to make me more like Jesus. My circumstances living in San Francisco, among the poor, in a intentional community, supported financially by others, single, and young are all things that God has intended to be a part of my life at this point. I feel like God has brought me hear and provided for me in order to grow in my understanding or him and see how ministry flows from this source regardless of life's circumstances. All of these things and the circumstances in life that are on the horizon are intended by the grace of God to make me more like Jesus. I can find rest in this truth. . .

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers."
Romans 8:28,29

These words give me hope. Even if there are moments when I wish things were different , even if it is as silly as owning stuff, I can remember that God has intended the events of my life to make me more like him. This process, sanctification, of making me more like Jesus ultimately brings God glory. It is so amazing to see the way that God is teaching me about issues and struggles in my own life in the midst of ministry on the streets. I am so thankful that in these struggles that God is working not only to change my heart but he is also at work around me and in the lives of people that I seek to build relationships with. God is capable of being glorified and bringing people to himself through the learning process that this life can be. Praise be to God. . .

"Ascribe to the Lord the glory due his name. . ."
Psalm 29:2